Sunday, April 1, 2012

The Dispatch From Escalatorville: Advice and Concepts

"I'd rather go broke, than buy into despair."
-Unemployed, but Happy, Philosopher
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NO, This isn't the early July 4th Edition
I'll admit, I've been a sideline fan of the recent up rise in population of our countries activist groups. Young and old folks, protesting against/for causes given a shuttered view by government, corporations, or mega-media - this is what we're all about!

Fighting for rights, justice, and equality is what has propelled us to being the Apex of Nations. Despite our struggles, current and past, the U.S.A. has stood as a beacon of achievement and hope to most other countries since the dawn of our existence. It is the Americans who have stood up, led marches, organized petitions, and started movements that brought us to prominence. I think we have, for the majority of the time - through time, trial, and tribulation - practiced what we preach concerning democracy and the common good without interference of outside influences.

That said, I have a request for today's Movementeers: please - straighten up your act, you're starting to look foolish.

I mean it. You cannot sell your message if your protest sign is misspelled. Unfortunately, we live in The Hyper-critical Society - no matter the logical strength of your cause or how meaningful a press conference you hold, some random media "reporter" will always interview the most clueless of your group.

Should you be that person, at least try to look semi-presentable, and keep your cool. Freedom of Personal Style is granted (and encouraged), but be aware that our Hyper-critical Society is also visually prejudiced. Frazzled hair, wild,eyes, and a wavering voice make a hard sell for anything but a theme park.

Finally, protesters and protestistas; I would urge you to come up with brand new, intelligent, and memorable slogans. Don't retread or paraphrase decent mottoes from times past - the unoriginality weakens your cause and cheapens the original. Make sure your motto is smart, but not too smart-assed - and no more than 7 easily repeated syllables. Nothing turns people away from a credible cause more than having to repeat overlong, insipid chants:

"WE ARE REALLY MAD. ABOUT A CERTAIN THING.
YOU ARE WRONG AND KIND OF SUCK.
ALSO. MAYBE, THIS RHYMES.
ALSO. MAYBE, THIS RHYMES."

I know, I know - leave it to me to criticize the motivated. I only want to help.
It's my opinion that, if you want to make a big change - you may have to start with some little ones too.

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The Dispatch From Escalatorville
Z.F. Lively, Proprietor/Double Standard Bearer
escalatorville@yahoo.com for truthful hypocrisies

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